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Dream Theory
Dream Therapy
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Instructions
Example 1
Example 2
Example 3
Example 4
One dream with four elements.
Dream1
I was with Tim (my youngest son) in a fun fair with several cycle tracks. I was afraid to walk on those tracks. Tim led me by the hand, though. At a given moment we could not go on. We were standing on the roof of a bandstand and he said, "We can jump down here, then we are closer to the exit." He jumped; I was still standing there. I did not have the courage to; then a wide-shouldered man in a torn shirt appeared and said: "Come and stand on my shoulders, then I'll help you get down." At the exit, however, there was a tub with goldfish in it and Charles (my husband) forced me to eat them. I did not want to, but he held my hands behind my back and forced me to eat them.
Dream Element1
"Tim (son) took my hand and led me through the fun fair"
| Self = 6 | Other = 19 |
| Positive = 16 | Negative = 4 |
correlates with the following Life Issue to a degree of .76:
Life Issue1
"I feel responsible for the atmosphere, wherever I am"
| Self = 7 | Other = 14 |
| Positive = 9 | Negative = 9 |
Dream Element2
"We were standing on the roof of a bandstand and he said, "We can jump down here, then we are closer to the exit"
| Self = 0 | Other = 8 |
| Positive = 3 | Negative = 17 |
correlates with the following Life Issue by a degree of .74:
Life Issue2:
"I often feel nervous and anxious"
| Self = 0 | Other = 8 |
| Positive = 0 | Negative = 20 |
Dream Element3
"Tim jumped: I did not have the courage to; then a tall wide-shouldered man in a torn shirt appeared and said: "Come and stand on my shoulders, then I'll help you get down"
| Self = 8 | Other = 16 |
| Positive = 20 | Negative = 0 |
correlates with the following Life Issue by a degree of .79:
Life Issue3
"I am beginning to accept my body as it is; I am satisfied with it"
| Self = 17 | Other = 18 |
| Positive = 18 | Negative = 0 |
Dream Element4
"Holding my hands on my back, Charles (husband) forced me to eat the fish, although I did not want to"
| Self = 0 | Other = 0 |
| Positive = 0 | Negative = 20 |
correlates with the following Life Issue by a degree of .99:
Life Issue4
"Mother accused us that we seduced Father"
| Self = 0 | Other = 0 |
| Positive = 0 | Negative = 19 |
Interpretation:
The fun fair is an ambiguous place. It includes elements that are both pleasant and unpleasant, much as life itself. Many of us have enjoyed these places tremendously, but have also seen, smelled, or actually experienced the consequences of overdoing it: vomiting. Fun fairs are full of out-of-control experiences which can be reminiscent of a sexual experience. However, it can be terrifying to someone with fairly rigid waking boundaries.
The correlation between Dream Element 1 and Life Element 1 is strong (.76). The high Interpersonal score (19) and Positive score (16) in Dream Element 1 indicates a very strong desire for intimate bonding. In Life Element 1, the Positive (9) and Negative (9) scores are equal indicating an ambiguity about feeling "responsible for the atmosphere, wherever I am." The combined Interpersonal scores (33) and Positive scores (25) of the Elements is very high. The moderately high Self-enhancement scores (13) shows that both Interpersonal and Self-enhancement are being served and a balance is established.
Dream Element 2 and Life Element 2 are strongly correlated (.74) and can be treated as one Element. The combined feeling here is Negative (37) with an Interpersonal score (16) indicating that you experience difficulties in your intimate relationships. A fear of intimacy often causes anxiety and involves the issue of trust.
Dream Element 3 and Life Element 3 correlate strongly (.79). You see others "jump" into intimacy but lack the courage yourself. But, a man, though flawed (the torn shirt), offers help which you accept. Your combined Self-enhancement scores (25) and Interpersonal scores (34) shows both are being served, your courage to accept help and your acceptance of your body "as it is." You also have a very high Positive score (38).
Dream Element 4 and Life Element 4 show an astoundingly strong correlation (.99). The only score above zero is Negative (30). Being "forced to eat the fish, although I did not want to" symbolizes fellatio and a more general sexual aversion or sexual phobia. Life Element 4, "Mother accused us that we seduced Father," implies that you were a victim of childhood sexual abuse by your father. Elements 1, 2 an 4 support this observation. However, Element 3 should be very encouraging to you.
Your hprofile shows a very high Male/Female ratio (+1.61) emphasizing your dealings with males in your life. A high Torso/Anatomy value (+2.22) reflects your struggle with how your concept about your body. Your Physical Aggression value (+1.90) indicates your victimization of childhood sexual abuse. High values in Success (+2.58), Failure (+2.50) and Striving (+2.56) indicates you have experienced success and failure but are still persevering.
Suggestion for dream rehearsal using visualization and guided imagery:You and your son, Tim, are walking around in a museum filled with wonderful exhibits. As you walk around in the museum, you become aware that that you don't know where the exit is. You stand, looking around in a confused state. A man notices your confused state and asks if he can help. You explain that in wandering around the museum, you have become lost and don't know the direction of the exit. He smiles and gives you directions to the exit. You explain that you don't know how you became so confused. He smiles and says that the same thing happened to him upon his first visit to the museum. Tim takes your hand and leads you to the exit. As you leave the building, you see your husband standing by a fish pond and go to meet him. As you close the distance you realize that the pond is filled with brilliantly colored tropical fish. When you reach your husband, you both admire their beauty.
Addendum:While not everyone who experiences child maltreatment shows symptoms, the effects of childhood abuse can continue well into adulthood. The long-term effects of past abuse can also affect your psychological and physical health, both of which can influence how you mother your own children.
If you have experienced abuse in childhood, you may see the world as a dangerous place. Because you have been powerless in the past, you may be highly fearful and overestimate danger and adversity in your current environment. You may also underestimate your own sense of self-efficacy and self-worth in dealing with both real and perceived danger, and feel that there is nothing you can do. You may feel powerless to protect and provide for your children.
Another category of symptoms is emotional distress including depression, anxiety, and anger. Depression is the most commonly reported symptom of past abuse. Adult survivors have a four-time greater lifetime risk for a major depressive episode compared with adults who have not been abused or neglected (Johnson, Cohen, Brown, Smailes & Bernstein 1999). Some of this vulnerability to depression has a physiological basis. Severe or chronic stressors may alter the way that your brain handles stressful events, leaving you more vulnerable to depression when confronted with a current life stress (Weiss, Longhurst & Mazure 1999).
Adult survivors are also at-risk to experience anxiety disorders, panic disorders, phobias, and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). These anxiety-related symptoms are frequently associated with PTSD responses and cognitive distortions. Anxiety can be made worse by a negative birth experience, or by having a baby who is premature, ill or disabled. These birth-related experiences, or on-going illness of your children, may make you very fearful.
Anger, another symptom of emotional distress, includes chronic irritability, rage, and difficulties in expressing anger in a constructive way. Survivors may suppress their anger to such an extent that they feel they have no right to be angry with their partner, co-workers, friends or children. These suppressed feelings may eventually explode. Anger has obvious implications for parenting and other relationships.
Women who have experienced childhood abuse often have an impaired sense of self. You may use the reactions of others to gauge how you are feeling about a particular situation. Because of this, you may be gullible and easily manipulated by others. You may be unable to establish appropriate boundaries, even with your children, and are often the caretaker of others within your network of friends and family. An impaired sense of self can also increase the risk of revictimization including rape or domestic abuse. Finally, you may have difficulty asking others for help, gathering a support network or taking advantage of support that is available. This can have direct implications for your emotional well-being and your ability to mother.
Avoidance is another long-term effect.one that is at the heart of many of the more serious symptoms. Avoidance symptoms can occur because they help you cope by temporarily reducing emotional pain. The first type of avoidance is dissociation. Dissociative symptoms often first appear during childhood, when they become a way to .escape. from abuse or pain. Adult survivors often describe how they were able to numb body parts at will, or how they would .watch. the abuse from above their body. Some mothers can still use dissociation to cope with uncomfortable feelings of intense contact with their babies or children. Dissociation gets to be a problem, however, when they have no control over when this happens.
Adult survivors of past abuse may also experience difficulties in relationships with others. These difficulties can influence your relationships with partners, friends, members of your family of origin, and your children. Evvie Becker-Lausen and Sharon Mallon-Kraft describe two dysfunctional interpersonal styles that they characterize as .pandemic. outcomes of past abuse. Adult survivors may adopt an avoidant style, which includes low interdependency, self-disclosure and warmth, leading to few interpersonal ties. Or they may adopt an intrusive style, which includes extremely high needs for closeness, excessive self-disclosure and being smotheringly warm. We could call the intrusive style .codependent.. The intrusive style is overly demanding and controlling. Interestingly, both styles result in loneliness. (You.ll also notice that the two styles are very similar to those of depressed mothers.)
Past abuse influences adult relationships. In a sample of incest survivors, those not in stable or secure relationships as adults were more likely to be depressed (Alexander, Anderson, Brand, Schaeffer, Grelling & Kretz. 1998). Past abuse can influence your ability to trust others, make friends, and have relationships that are not exploitive. Adult survivors are often isolated and are less satisfied with their relationships than adults who were never abused. If you are an abuse survivor, you may find it difficult to find an adequate support network to help you cope with the stresses of parenting.
This is another time when having the support of others who have gone through similar experiences can be important. The process of recovery from traumatic events can take a long time. It.s helpful if you have people in your life who understand that, and will give you the space to heal.
Support is especially important if you are irritable, withdrawn, or having difficulties controlling your anger. All of these can be symptoms of depression, a common occurrence among adult survivors. If you feel like lashing out at your child, or are feeling detached, you need to find someone to help you through these times. Be realistic about how much responsibility you take on. You may feel resentful when your children don.t appreciate all the hard work that you are doing on their behalf, or how much better their childhood is than yours. When you are in danger of blowing your top, call someone. Most cities have .warmlines. or chapters of Parents Anonymous. These numbers are in the front of your phone book. Have them handy for when you need them. You might also consider seeking out one or more mothering mentors. Many times, adult survivors have no idea how to parent since their own upbringing was so difficult. We all tend to parent as we were parented. Many have joked about opening their mouths, and hearing their mothers. voices come out. If you want to break the cycle of abuse, find someone who can help.
Reactions to past abuse vary from person to person. The experiences of some survivors are relatively mild, while others experience severe reactions. Even when the experience was severe, however, there is hope for healing. Life can be good. You can indeed become strong in the broken places.
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| Characters | <- | norm | -> |
|---|---|---|---|
| Male/Female Percent | +1.61 | ||
| Familiarity Percent | +0.17 | ||
| Friends Percent | -1.30 | ||
| Family Percent | +1.00 | ||
| Dead & Imaginary Percent | -0.19 | ||
| Animal Percent | +0.63 | ||
| Social Interaction Percent | |||
| Aggression/Friendliness Percent | -0.37 | ||
| Befriender Percent | -1.51 | ||
| Aggressor Percent | -1.22 | ||
| Physical Aggression Percent | +1.90 | ||
| Social Interaction Ratios | |||
| A/C Index | +0.03 | ||
| F/C Index | +0.67 | ||
| S/C Index | -0.03 | ||
| Settings | |||
| Indoor Setting Percent | -1.80 | ||
| Familiar Setting Percent | N/A | ||
| Self-Concept Percents | |||
| Self-Negativity Percent | -0.47 | ||
| Bodily Misfortunes Percent | N/A | ||
| Negative Emotions Percent | +0.92 | ||
| Dreamer-Involved Success Percent | +0.15 | ||
| Torso/Anatomy Percent | +2.22 | ||
| Dreams with at Least One: | |||
| Aggression | +1.68 | ||
| Friendliness | +1.73 | ||
| Sexuality | -0.38 | ||
| Misfortune | -1.23 | ||
| Good Fortune | -0.48 | ||
| Success | +2.58 | ||
| Failure | +2.50 | ||
| Striving | +2.36 |